Monthly Archives: April 2012

Larger than Life

This post is the eulogy my wife Becky wrote and delivered at the funeral yesterday for Florence Lion. You might not have known Florence, but I suspect that there is a Florence somewhere in your experience who suffered heartache during her life but kept giving and kept smiling.

Funeral Service for Florence A. Lion 
 April 16, 2012 – Chapel, Manassas Baptist Church
 We are gathered here this morning to celebrate the life of Florence Lion, a daughter, wife, mother, grandmother, great-grandmother, sister, mother-in-law, sister-in-law, cousin and friend.  Born on Flag Day in 1919, the year that the 19th Amendment was passed giving women the right to vote, Florence saw an amazing amount of change in the 92+ years of life that God gave her.  The world changed around her with inventions, the administrations of 17 presidents of the United States, two World Wars and locally, the growth of Manassas and Prince William County.
All of this changed, but Florence did not.  Until her final breath, she remained the sweet person that all of us as family and friends loved.  Those of us who knew her at Manassas Baptist Church knew that her warm smile preceded her.  Short in stature, Florence stood tall when it came to her faith and the ways she demonstrated it.
For years, she was a fixture in our nursery hallway, where you could find her rocking our bed babies and singing to them or down in the floor with our toddlers, smiling at them and telling them that God loved them.  This was her place of service until she was in her seventies and I’m sure that there are hundreds of adults today who benefited from her loving care when they were preschoolers at our church.
Florence sang in our Sanctuary Choir and our Joyful Noise Senior Adult Choir.  Faithful to both groups, she sang strongly and with an expression on her face that said, “I believe what I’m singing!”
A cheerful giver, Florence took her financial responsibility to her church seriously.  When I helped in the church office as a teenager and a young adult, I was asked to record the amounts that were given on Sundays by members who used offering envelopes.  When I got to Florence’s envelope, the amount was always listed as both dollars and cents.  After several weeks of seeing these, I realized that she was tithing her income, not only down to the dollar, but to the cents as well.  Florence had made a pledge to God and she honored it completely.
All these commitments were important, but the strength of her faith and the ways she demonstrated it were what shone through to everyone the most.  Because she was left to raise three boys as a single parent until she met and married Jack Lion, Florence was sensitive to other single moms in our congregation and would ask them how they were doing and if they needed help.  She cared deeply for her friends and provided food and support when they were needed.  As a result, her church community was there for her when she needed it, especially following the loss of her sons Martin and David when each of them was only 45 years old.
I’ll always remember her comment to Dan and me as we stood beside her at Baker Funeral Home following David’s death.  “The church” she said, “has been here for years to help me raise my sons, and now they’re here to support me as I give another one of them back to the Lord.”
I was stunned and amazed at this statement: here was a mother grieving the passing of the second of her three sons and yet her response to this loss had no bitterness, just trust in the One who had given her and her children life, and appreciation for all those in her faith community who had nurtured and loved her children.  From that night on, Florence Lion was one of my heroes.  A hero is defined as somebody who has shown an admirable quality such as great courage or strength of character or somebody who is admired for outstanding qualities.  Florence qualified on both counts.
These last years in Manassas and then in Fort Mill, SC with Mary as her companion and caregiver have been a modern-day “Ruth and Naomi” story and allowed Florence to be in a home setting until the day she reached her heavenly home.  Failing health and diminished abilities did not change the sweetness of her personality.  She wondered why so many people sent her birthday cards or flowers one summer when I visited her at home and she marveled at how her church family celebrated with her when she turned ninety.  Her humility was another lesson that I’ll always carry with me.
In closing, I’ll share an insight from a pastor who spoke at the funeral of a member of his congregation.  He gave the birth and death dates of the person and then said, “There’s a dash in between those two dates, and all that the dash signifies is what’s important.”  
I agree with him today.  Florence Lion (June 14, 1919 – April 10, 2012).  May each of us here today give thanks to God for the dash and for all that Florence meant to us and to the Kingdom of God.  We will miss her, but we rejoice that she is now in the presence of the Lord that she loved and served so well.  Florence Lion, new in Christ.

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Buried Treasures

I was cleaning up and reorganizing our rather small and  disorganized laundry room a couple of days ago when I came across an item I thought long lost. It was a bit like the opening scene to The Scarlet Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorne [don’t worry Biscuit Cityites, I won’t make you read it again (if you read it in the first place)—I’m the only high school English teacher in the universe (that I know of) (retired edition) who believes that The Scarlet Letter is an absolutely horrid book to inflict on high school students. It’s OK for English majors who have chosen their poison and it’s actually not a bad book, with all kinds of cool symbolism (the gallows! The prison house! The sunlight! The forest! The scarlet letter itself! Anything in the story that’s not nailed down!) but likely to cause permanent mental and physical damages to innocent juniors in h.s. If you were so unfortunate to have read it and not majored in English, the effects will probably fade in a few years. No one is going to ask you about it or give you an essay test on it unless you lead a really weird life, in which case The Scarlet Letter is the least of your problems.]
And hey, it ain’t Moby Dick. Be thankful for that.
Anyhow, in the frame story, Hawthorne purports to be bored stiff (that’s appropriate since his book did that to millions of innocent young readers) in his cushy job at the Salem Custom House that his college buddy President Franklin (“The Whiz”) Pierce got for him so that  he has nothing to do but dream up stories. Anyhow, he is poking around a long-neglected storage room when he opens an ancient chest and discovers—bazinga!—the scarlet letter! And a manuscript telling the whole sordid story so that he can just “copy it” and not have to take any blame for actually having written it, wink, wink. (Reality check: he made up the whole thing, frame story, tale of the Boston Puritan Fun Bunch, everything. Sorry, kids. There is also no Easter bunny.
Anyhow, the item I came across was a 7-11 Big Gulp travel cup. Or rather, “travel buoy.” It’s pictured here complete with an archeologist-looking ruler for scale. 
The travel buoy belonged to my student Mitchell. And therein lies a tale not of sin and punishment and sick minister love puppies, but of, well, you be the judge.
I don’t know if you’ve ever known someone who absolutely drove you to distraction but whom you loved nonetheless. Doesn’t make sense, does it? But I had several students fitting this description when I taught, and the chief among them was a fellow named Mitchell (not his real name). I had him in English 9, 10 and 11, and by the time he became a junior, he was, as Becky’s grandmother used to say, “right.”
By 11th grade, Mitchell was enrolled in the Auto Tech program at Chantilly High School. Like other students in the Academy program, he had classes there in the morning and then came to Robinson for core classes, including English. Mitchell was rough but brilliant. He dressed like a mechanic on duty, which he was, and loved to push the rules. One incident illustrates this. Students were not allowed to have food or drink in the classroom, which I didn’t care about as long as they didn’t make a mess. Some kids brought Cheerios in a plastic bag and ate them for breakfast; others carried water bottles. But not Mitchell. He swaggered into class one afternoon, late as usual, carrying the largest Big Gulp container anyone had ever seen. It was day-glo orange and as big as a small barrel. I still have it since I confiscated it from him.
“Mitchell,” I said, “What is that?”
He took a long pull on the straw protruding from the drink.  “It’s my drink.”
“Give it here,” I said.
“Why? They—“ he pointed to a couple of girls who were cross-country runners who had small water bottles on their desks—“have drinks.”
“Give it.”
I think he figured I was serious, because he took another long draw and slowly walked to the front of the room. He handed me the drink, and after I put it down, turned around and hugged me.
Hugging was Mitchell’s secret weapon. He used it on everyone—teachers, principals, other students. If he got in trouble, as he frequently did, he would listen to the lecture for a while and then hug whoever was talking to him. And he was strong.  When he hugged me I couldn’t breathe. I tried to tell him to stop but the words wouldn’t come out. He finally let me go and ambled back to his seat. One of the cross-country runners looked hard at him. “You’re weird,” she said.
Mitchell was weird but he was also an original thinker. I never knew what he would write or say. He wrote one paper that was so incredibly racist I wouldn’t accept it. He kept saying he had a right to his opinion. I said he did but I didn’t have to count it for credit because school regulations prohibited that kind of expression. I told him he could appeal my decision to the principal. He gave me a hug and took a “0” on the paper.
We were talking about eternity one day in a discussion of a Longfellow poem whose title I don’t remember. The class had shared their ideas about eternity and heaven for about half an hour when Mitchell suddenly blurted out, “But does it matter?”
He was not in the habit of raising his hand to speak.
“Does what matter, Mitchell? And raise your hand if you want to speak.”
He dutifully raised his hand and said, “If I’m following this discussion right, we’re saying that none of us can really understand or even conceive of eternity or know what heaven is like.”
“That’s right,” I nodded. “That’s what we’ve been saying.”
“Well, if we can’t understand it or conceive of it, why are we talking about it?”
 There was silence. No one spoke for a while, and then I said, “Because that’s what we do in English.”
I don’t think he heard me because he had become interested in something outside the window. But he was, in a way, right. And he was, in many ways, like each of us. He honestly tried to go by the rules and do the right thing, but he couldn’t help breaking them and straying from the path. Like us, he was capable of expressing the love that God must have had for him—expressing it awkwardly, but expressing it nonetheless. 
I last saw Mitchell at graduation. I hadn’t seen him much during his senior year, but as he came up to me in his cap and gown, I knew what was coming. Before I could run the other way, he had me in a bear hug and was squeezing the breath out of me. He mercifully let me go and put out his hand. “Mr. V. I want to thank you for all you did for me and for putting up with me when I was obnoxious in class.”
“Thank you, Mitchell. I wish you well, whatever you do.”
He turned to rejoin his friends but turned back. “Mr. V.—one more thing—I love you, man.”
Graduation always got to me despite how bad some of the kids have been. So I said, “And I love you, Mitchell.”
He smiled. “Yeah, Mr. V.  I know.”
We can’t understand eternity or know what heaven is like. But I believe we will experience both eventually, although we are incomplete and do the wrong things like Mitchell. And as God greets us when we go to live with him, I see him wrapping us up in the tightest, most loving hug we have ever known.

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Poem of the Week: Nothing Gold Can Stay

Here’s a picture I took of a tree with the first leaves on it a couple of weeks ago. The green is so light it looks almost golden and of course this color does not last long as the leaves turn a darker green. I was reminded of a Robert Frost poem:
Nothing Gold Can Stay
Nature's first green is gold, 
Her hardest hue to hold.
Her early leaf's a flower;
But only so an hour.
Then leaf subsides to leaf.
So Eden sank to grief,
So dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay.

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Advice for Writers: A Pretty Much Unedited Facebook Thread

Leigh Giza Writer vs. Author. Discuss.
 Fun vs. obligation? Creativity vs. productivity?
Dan Verner: Duh vs. d’oh…sheez, I dunno…
 Stop making me think so hard! :^)
Leigh Giza Sorry! It is way too early in the day to be thinking…
‎…clearly.
Dan Verner Dooby dooby doo…I should be working on taxes. How are you?
I will have to think about your original post and get back to you with something halfway intelligent, maybe in a couple of weeks…
Katherine Mercurio Gotthardt Writers write, authors publish. You can be a good writer and never get published. Conversely, you can be a poor writer and be published, even multiple times.

Dan Verner Excellent distinction, Katherine. Can anyone be a writer, then?

Leigh Giza True! But when one is both writer and author, the lines blur. Oui?
Dan Verner So the unpublished matter is the work of the writer and the published the work of the author? Or are the two roles one and the same if they are in one person? Sheez, this is like being on “Face the Nation!”
Leigh Giza Perhaps we should let Webster’s dictionary have the last word. Then we don’t have to…
Dan Verner I will have to send you my column on encyclopedias some time…
Leigh Giza I started this discussion because I am trying to figure out if being a writer and an author are complementary or different, now that I have published a book. Sometimes I want to go back to being a little old writer who never put her stuff in print, but then I am glad I put my book out too. Oh, and I used to write for newsletters and newspapers — I was a wannabe journalist, I suppose. Hmmmm. writer vs. author vs. journalist. Discuss…
Katherine Mercurio Gotthardt Leigh, you can be both an author and writer, but the distinction is in publishing. Dan, writers write, so yes, anyone can be a writer at heart. However, not all writers are good writers, nor are all authors. At least that is my non-Webster response. Ha!

You are a good writer, Leigh, so I, for one, am pleased you are also an author. : ) That said, putting yourself out there makes you vulnerable to critics, readers who personalize every word you write, and perverts. Haha!

Dan Verner ‎@ Leigh…stop raising such thought-provoking questions! Stop it now! (NOT!) I have to go to lunch now. If I had half an hour I would try to make an intelligent contribution to this thread. But I don’t so I won’t. One thought, Leigh, and that is I just about have a conniption when someone doesn’t “get” my writing…recently someone (who will remain nameless) told me that funny bit (that ten people had found ROTFL funny) in a column wasn’t funny. I should have accepted that as one person’s opinion but it drove me nuts. Because it WAS FUNNY! So there!

Ladies: Thank you for being the writers and people you are. I treasure our friendships.

MaryKay Montgomery Okay, Dan. To what funny bit are you referring? We MUST know. Soon.
Lonnie Martin Author = established body of long form work; writer = one who writes on a regular basis in other formats besides novel length fiction and non-fiction
Leigh Giza Well, I guess that makes me a writer/poet.
Dan Verner ‎@Mary Kay: It was a comment I made in a column that I didn’t want to run over some kids coming out of a high school because they would go on to grow up and work and pay my social security. Not screamingly funny, I agree, but a wry observation (I thought) on the generation gap and our economic and social system. The nameless person who had the final say over the writing said it would offend younger readers and cut it out. I said it was a JOKE. Nameless person said it wasn’t funny. Score: Nameless Person 1, Columnist 0.

@Leigh: Yep, that’s what you are!

 ‎@Katherine: I liked your post, “… anyone can be a writer at heart. However, not all writers are good writers, nor are all authors. At least that is my non-Webster response.” I like that better than anything Mr. Webster could have written.
Katherine Mercurio Gotthardt I find your column humor very funny, Dan. It would have been different if you said something like, “Damn lazy kids these days don’t want to work, which means they won’t pay into my social security, so I’ve started stalking crosswalks to see how many young ones I can take out with my 1954 Chevy Impala.”

MaryKay Montgomery I write things on various Facebook walls, and I write letters, and I write reports. Ergo I’m a writer. But I am NOT an author, sad to say.

Dan Verner ‎@Katherine: Thanks! I did write a column on how hard kids work (which means they will make a lot of money and PAY FOR MY SOCIAL SECURITY). I should do a column along the lines you suggest for an April Fool’s joke!

MK: You write very well, and indeed all the places that you write and the genres that you use make you an author. The world of “publishing” has changed and there are so many new venues to use to reach people. As a matter of fact…

Dan Verner:  Ladies and Gentlemen of the Thread (Leigh Giza, Katherine Mercurio Gotthardt, William Golden and MaryKay Montgomery, May I have your individual and collective permission to work this thread into my Thursday “Advice for Writers” blog post? I think the thinking and writing are as good as it gets. I find that FB is a great place to blow off steam (with some HUMOR) and explore ideas, share glimpses of our world and experience, use different modes of written expression, etc. etc. And ain’t that what writing has always been about since early people scratched pictures in the walls of caves?
Leigh Giza: Permission granted. Remind me to read your blog on Thursday. 🙂
Dan Verner ‎@Leigh: What? You don’t read it first thing every day??? ;^) JK–I’m amazed and pleased that anyone reads it ever! Thanks!

@Katherine: Thank you!

MaryKay Montgomery It will be fun to see what you develop from this conversation.
Dan Verner I have no idea at this point… :^)

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Talented Daughter and Proud Mom

Beth Markley is a FB friend who lives half a world away in Japan. She posts the most interesting links, observations and pictures, all reminders of how this electronic media brings the world to us.

Beth’s daughter, Rachel, is at the University of Chicago, studyi ng to be an actuary. She’s taking calculus as a freshman and likes languages, having studied Serbian, Japanese and Latin (six years). She crochets, spins her own yarn and won a grant to ‘yarnbomb’ the campus with yarn made objects. One of her talents is making crochet animals.

Her proud mama adds, “I find her to be a delightful person.” 🙂

By going to the site below and clicking “like,” people can support her desire to learn to be in the circus.

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10150662641548225 &
set=o.185063821542169&type=1&t
heater

To which mom adds, “I know, right?”

From my first trapeze taster class! It was so fun. I love being in the air.

(I remember when kids threatened to run away and join the circus when home life didn’t suit them. Now they can take classes in college! As Willie Nelson sang, “What a Wonderful World!” )


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R0xoMhCT-7A

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Return to Biscuit City: Project Puppies

It’s good to be back in the glass-enclosed brain center of the Biscuit City studios. There has been a little renovation work going on here while we were on spring break this past week. The old carpet is gone, although the new one is not in yet, and the chair where I sit writing this has a new vinyl pad under it to keep from scraping the hardwood floors. Unfortunately, the studio was built by the lowest bidder, which means that the floors aren’t exactly level. I sit down in the chair and it goes rolling back to the side wall. Not exactly what I had planned, but a nice trip anyhow.

My brother Ron is a wonderful renovator and repair man (even fixes acoustic guitars), and he says that projects have puppies. By this he means that you start out fixing one thing which causes something else to break or not work correctly so that you’re then working on two puppies from the original case. Or a project has puppies by not going as you expected it to.

I started a project this weekend using landscape timbers for edging the front of our front azalea bed. I had had experience last year with building some raised beds for a  couple of hydrangeas so I figured it wouldn’t be that hard to run 40 or so feet of the timbers, one atop another to form a wall,  across the front of the bed.

Wrong again. The problem is that with the raised bed I was using about six-foot lengths of the lumber. The present project uses eight-foot lengths which have an unfortunate tendency to curl, twist and bend when placed in some semblance of a wall. I can pry and persuade and force them into place but that’s a whole lot more work than I thought it would be. The thought project puppy. Now there’s an app we can all do without!

Right now my “retaining wall” looks like strands of spaghetti at the end with the timbers going every which way. I’ll take a picture for illustrative purposes.  But I’ll get them into line with a combination of foot-long pieces of rebar, a bunch of six-inch lag screws, a long pry bar, some muscle (such as it is), most likely some personal injury (I manage to whang myself with the pry bar at least once during such proceedings–look for the mark on my forehead–ouch!), American ingenuity and some German persistence courtesy of my ancestors. Or, as my mother used to say, “Persistence or stupidity: I don’t know which it is with you.”

Here are the warped ties, in place but warped! Twisted! Misshapen!

And a couple of shots of completed sections where the timbers have been “persuaded” into place.

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Good Bye To Biscuit City Beach

And so, as the sun sinks slowly into the west, we bid a fond adieu to Biscuit City Beach until next year…”Like sands through the hourglass, so are the days of our lives.” Oh, wait. Wrong program. Oops.

Biscuit City is back to normal (whatever “normal” is) on Monday! Hope to see you then!

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BIG BEACH BARBEQUE

The fun rolls on at Biscuit City Beach! If you’re in the area, join us for this evening’s Big Biscuit City Barbeque and Cookout right on the beach!  Nancy Whiskey is digging the fire pit and all the gourmet cooks on staff are whipping up their specialties! It’ll be food, fun, surf and Jimmy Buffett on the boom box! (There’s a rumor that Jimmy himself might come to entertain…so we’ll have shrimp and margaritas in his honor…just in case!)

“Smell those shrimp, they’re beginning to…grill…”

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Biscuit City Women’s Beach Volleyball Team

That’s Nancy Whiskey to the far left, before she was dropped from the team for rough hitting. (Note: not a real team, and a stock photo of a beach volleyball team from somewhere.)

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Beach Ladies

A couple of BC staffers (wearing Manassas Chorale shirts, for some reason) enjoying the sun and surf at the Biscuit City Resort and Day Spa. Come on down and join them!

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