The Cats Are Having an Easter Egg Hunt

Cat and Easter Eggs

You expect me to pick up these things with my paws? Are you crazy?

The cats are having an Easter egg hunt,

And, as usual, they’re not happy about it.

They don’t have fingers after all—

They have paws

Which you would know

If you were paying attention

Which you’re not,

So listen up!

Have you ever tried to pick up

An egg without fingers?

It’s frustrating and

Darn near impossible,

So the cats call on their people

To help them

But the humans are not interested—

They don’t like eggs and they’d

Rather eat steak and sleep most of the day.

The cats are sorry they ever picked out

Their human from the human store

And wonder if they can take them back.

Anyhow, the cats still have the problem of

Hiding the eggs

Which they finally do by

Kicking them with their hind legs

But they’re too strong

And the egg shells shatter

And the cats are left with a big mess to

Clean up.

They don’t like eggs either

So they leave the shells and yolks and whites

Where they are

For the birds to scavenge.

But then they have an idea

They do like birds, so

They lie in wait,

Hiding themselves like the eggs

They couldn’t hide before

And when the birds show up,

They pounce!

But they’re fat and slow

From not going to the cat gym

Although it is a benefit of their jobs

At Catco Inc. and, sitting on their recliners

Watching Born Free and The Lion King

Over and over again. They don’t catch

Any birds at all so they slump home,

Climb on the couch and watch

The Incredible Journey on

The Cat Family Network

And think if they ever had to

Travel thousands of miles

To get back home

They wouldn’t do it.

They’d just start all over again

In an ideal town with hard-working humans

And, best of all, no Easter egg hunts.


Dan Verner

March 25, 2016


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