Wait. That’s not entirely true.
Not all the cats are going on spring break,
Only the student cats who are
Going to go off to where it’s warm
And they can drink themselves
Silly on milk and
Chase mice and
Parade around without clothes
(But no one seems to notice)
And shred the cushions
In the motel room.
Yes, that’s what the student cats do
While the parent cats
Stay home and go to work
Each day and think about their
“Vacation” where they take their
Cat phones to the beach
So they can answer emails
Because it’s part of their job.
It’s also hard to press the screen
With their pads, and they have
To try again and again and usually
Have to get their human (who came with them—
They don’t have enough sense to be
Left at him) answer the emails
For them. The cats also worry about
What kind of trouble their
Kittens have gotten into
And don’t sleep for waiting
On the phone call from the police dogs
Telling them that their little cats are
In jail and they can bail them out
If they want to.
The parent cats don’t want to
But fear being the subject of gossip
At the office,
Fear being thought a bad parent
Even though the student cats have been bad.
It’s not fair, this being responsible and adult,
And it just makes the parent cats angry,
Which is how they stay most of the time anyhow,
So probably the student cats figure
They might as well go to the beach
And have what passes for a good time
While they still can.
April 13, 2017